Daddy, Are You a Pirate?

Joe Capell
It really should go without saying, but I'm going to say it anyway: Parents shouldn't use curse words in front of their children.It's basic common sense. If you don't want your kids to swear like sailors, you probably shouldn't swear when you're around them. (You probably shouldn't swear even when you're not around them, but that's a topic for...

How did we survive without our phones?

without our phones
By Joe CapellThe other day I did something unbelievably amazing. I wandered into the bathroom and sat down on the toilet before I realized: I DIDN'T HAVE MY PHONE WITH ME! Yes, that's right, I actually went to the bathroom WITHOUT MY PHONE!I know, it's incredible, isn't it? Those may have been the longest two minutes of my life....

Cash or Credit Card?

cash
By Joe CapellI like cash. Don't we all? (And I'm not talking about Johnny Cash. Although I can't help but sing along anytime I hear "Ring of Fire.") I like the look and feel of dollar bills in my wallet. (There's not much in there right now.) There's something very gratifying about paying for something with a crisp (or...

Splash pads or sprinklers?

sprinklers
These kids today are so spoiled. Back in my day, if it was hot, do you know what we could do? Sweat. We could sweat. Maybe we could find some shade under a tree so we could sweat a little less. Or, if we were really lucky we might talk Mom into letting us drag a hose out onto...

The Funny-ish Files: These Are My Problems….

my problems
These are my problems:The ice-maker on the refrigerator spat out an extra ice cube when I wasn't looking, so there was a cold, wet spot on the kitchen floor that I stepped in with my bare feet.There's a guy driving in the fast lane going only three miles an hour over the speed limit, so I have to get...

Where Is the Mother’s Day Parade?

Mother's Day parade
So, when are they having the Mother's Day Parade?Here in America, we'll throw a parade for just about any holiday. There's the Rose Bowl Parade on New Year's Day. There's the Macey's Thanksgiving Day Parade. There are lots of St. Patrick's Day parades across the country, and even more parades on the 4th of July. We don't have military...

What’s the Difference Between a Dad Joke and a Funny Joke?

dad joke
People say "Dad jokes" like it's a bad thing. Personally, I don't see any difference between "Dad jokes" and "funny jokes." (Maybe that's because I'm a dad.)The other day I was in the kitchen by myself while The Wife was in the next room with our two babies. I found myself a banana and said, "Hello." From the other...

The Funny-ish Files: Beware The Sound of Silence!

silence
By Joe CapellChildren make a lot of noise. They make sad noises when they cry. They make annoying noises when they argue with each other. They make happy sounds when they are playing. They make giggly sounds when they are laughing. There are good sounds and bad sounds, but there is one sound that is scarier than them all:...

The Laundry Is Never Done

laundry
So, you are finished with the laundry? Good for you. But, are you naked? Unless you are naked, you are not REALLY finished with the laundry, because the clothes you are wearing need to be washed. (And if you are naked, please tell me that you aren't at the laundromat!)Doing the laundry seems simple enough: just put the clothes...

9 things to do instead of looking at your phone

phone
By Joe Capell Everywhere you go anymore, you'll find people staring down at their rectangles. They'll be Facebooking or Pinteresting or Twittering or somethinging.(I'm officially old now. Why? Because I'm about to use the old man's phrase: "Back in my day.")Back in my day, we didn't have all-knowing telephones we carried with us wherever we went. Our phones were mounted...