How did we survive without our phones?

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r By Joe Capell

The other day I did something unbelievably amazing. I wandered into the bathroom and sat down on the toilet before I realized: I DIDN’T HAVE MY PHONE WITH ME! Yes, that’s right, I actually went to the bathroom WITHOUT MY PHONE!

I know, it’s incredible, isn’t it? Those may have been the longest two minutes of my life. But, somehow, I was able to get through it. I was able to sit there WITHOUT my phone, unable to check my messages, catch up on the latest scores, or play any games. So, what did I do? I just sat there. I sat there and thought about a few things. What did I think about? I thought about how I would never step into the bathroom without my phone again!

I’m joking, of course. (Mostly.) We’ve become so dependent on our cell phones that we sometimes forget the things we used to be able to do without them.

There was a time, not so long ago, when if you wanted to find out the score of a game, you’d have to turn on your television to ESPN and wait through some highlights on SportsCenter until they’d get to your game. Or, you’d have to watch the local ten o’clock news and hope that the sportscaster would read the score of the game in which you were interested. Or, you might even have to WAIT UNTIL THE NEXT DAY and find the score in the newspaper!

There was a time, not so long ago, when if you wanted to find a recipe for tater tot casserole you’d have to go browse through all of your cookbooks and file folders until you found a recipe that would work. Or, you’d have to call your Aunt Beverly to get the recipe, and that would mean listening to her ramble on for fifteen minutes about the latest family gossip.

There was a time, not so long ago, when if you wanted to know who the 11th President of the United States was, you’d have to go to the bookshelf and pull out the encyclopedia. (P for president.) Or, you’d have to call your know-it-all Uncle Bert. Or, you’d just have to guess. (Umm…Grover Fillmore? Cleveland Harrison? George Harrison?)

And, there was a time, not so long ago, when if you went to the bathroom you had to just sit there and look at the designs in the linoleum floor. (How did we ever manage to survive?)

For more funny-ish stuff, check out slowjoe40.com.

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