It’s a new year, and like clockwork, many of us have just sat down with a fresh notebook or a notes app and written out our New Year’s resolutions. We promise ourselves this year will be different. We’ll be healthier. We’ll save more. We’ll chase that dream we keep putting off.
If you know me, you know I am deeply growth-driven. You might assume I love New Year’s resolutions. But the truth is, I don’t. And it’s not because growth doesn’t matter—it’s because resolutions are often one of the biggest setups for failure.
Why do we fail at our resolutions so often?
Because a resolution is usually just a wish. It’s the what, without any real commitment to the how. Resolutions are vague. “I want to lose weight.” “I want to be successful.” “I want to be happier.” They sound good, but they lack structure, clarity, and accountability. Without those, motivation fades—and by February, most resolutions are already forgotten.
So, this year, instead of making resolutions, let’s make goals.
Goals are different. Goals are intentional. They are specific, measurable, and actionable. A goal has detail. A goal has a plan. A goal has a deadline. Goals don’t just live in your head; they live on your calendar and in your daily choices.
Most people stop there. They set the goal and hope motivation carries them through. If you truly want this year to be different, however, there are deeper questions we need to ask. But, before we get to those questions, I want to share a powerful story.
Before John Assaraf became a successful businessman, bestselling author of life-changing books like “Innercise,” as well as a recognized leader in personal development, he was a 19-year-old kid with no direction. He had no drive, was getting into trouble with the law, and was heading nowhere fast.
Then he met a man named Mr. Brown.
Mr. Brown saw John’s potential even when John couldn’t see it himself. Knowing John’s history, Mr. Brown asked him a simple but life-altering question: What does your dream life look like? What do you want out of life?
After thinking about it, John answered with the big dream—mansions and millions.
Mr. Brown told him he could help him achieve that dream. But first, he asked John one critical question: Are you interested, or are you committed?
John didn’t understand the difference, so Mr. Brown explained it the following way:
“If you’re interested, when things get hard, you’ll quit. But if you’re committed, when things get hard, you’ll figure out how to do it anyway.”
That single question changed John’s life.
Now let me ask you—when you think about your goal for this year—are you interested, or are you committed?
If you’re committed, then it’s time to prepare for success by answering some important questions.
First, project yourself into the future, saying things like, “If I achieve this goal, how will it make me feel?”
Really sit with that. Try the goal on emotionally. Feel the pride, the confidence, the relief, the excitement.
Now ask the harder question: “If I don’t achieve this goal, how will it make me feel?” Will you feel disappointment? Regret? Frustration? Sometimes clarity comes not just from what we want, but from what we no longer want to feel.
Next, consider the ripple effect.
Who else will be affected if I succeed—and how will they feel? Your family. Your children. Your partner. Your community. Your success rarely impacts only you.
Then ask yourself honestly: “Can I achieve this goal?”
On a scale of 1 to 10, how much do you truly believe you will achieve it? If your answer is below an 8, that’s not failure—that’s feedback. It means belief and confidence need to be strengthened before action can be sustained.
Now it’s time to get real about what might stop you.
What are your sabotages of choice? Are they procrastinating? Scrolling. TV. Being “too busy.” These aren’t character flaws; they’re patterns. Awareness gives you the power to interrupt them.
What old self-talk patterns could shut you down and steal your dreams? “I’m not enough.” “I’m not worthy.” “Who do I think I am?”
You can’t create a new future while listening to an old story.
Now ask the most important questions of all: What will it take to achieve this goal? What must you learn? What skills do you need to master? What time must be invested?
This is where many people quit—not because they can’t do it, but because they feel overwhelmed. But here’s the truth: if I asked you for just 30 minutes a day for 30 days and promised you a million dollars at the end, you would find the time. Time isn’t the issue—priority is.
What choices must you make? Is it getting up earlier? Saying no more often? Choosing discipline over comfort?
What arrangements need to be made? Do you need help with your kids? A partner taking on more? Support systems that make success possible?
What conversations need to happen? Perhaps you need to let people know this goal matters—and how it may temporarily change routines.
What fears do you need to face? Is it the fear of failure? Fear of success? Fear of other people’s opinions?
What obstacles must you overcome? Is it mindset? Lack of support? Money?
What habits must be released? Do you sleep in too much? Do you quit when it gets hard? Do you wait for motivation to come your way?.
What beliefs must be created? How about, “I will succeed.” “This is what I’m meant to do.” “I am enough.”
What money needs to be invested? If finances are required, know the number and make a plan.
Now that you’ve looked honestly at what success will require, I’ll ask you again: Are you interested… or are you committed? Because here’s the truth: you already have everything you need inside you. The courage. The strength. The resilience. The ability to figure it out as you go.
This is your time. This is your year. This is your moment to become the best version of yourself yet.
